another sleepless night

Darkness all around. A shade occasionally makes a shape. A mixture of thoughts confuses my head. Too many things rush through my mind, and I cannot grasp any one of them. My heart beats like grazy. I'm sweating, lying and waiting. A warm wave of pressure sweeps over me. Waiting for the morning. These nights pass so quickly. Between a moment of real and unreal, of sleep and being awake. Why can't I get any sleep?

A tale of winter

A short moment of loneliness. No place to go. The nothingness of the being reveals a glimpse of itself to me. I remember the times when the blissful moments of nothingness in the between of the two passing points were my most cherished moments, and the grey sky above greeted me as I cherished my solitude in my fortress of despair and agony. Now those same moments bring me a temporal relief, but they also remind me of what has gone and what is yet to come. Now there is only one month of waiting until my love finally returns, and everything will once again be calm and beautiful.

The moment is at hands. There is still some winter to go, but the darkest time of the year is already behind. The sight behind the window does not give much inspiration to me. Why is it so hard to express myself? All my feelings and emotions are rioting, but I cannot find the words to put them in place. So I just sit and think of nothing, as if there was nothing better to do.

It's cold, white, and silent outside. People are too afraid to face themselves, and therefore they hide behind the facade of what they wish they were. They are too afraid to be what they are, and hence they live in the future of hopes and dreams, chasing the moment, without however realizing that they already live in it. I try not to be bothered by their existence. A lonely little bird has found something to eat on the ground. Snow falls from the trees. A gentle breeze of winter embraces my face. Moments pass by. A street opens itself up before me. "There was nothing to fear, nothing to doubt..."